


Someone Will Come Running

by CravingCraze



Category: Dear Evan Hansen - Pasek & Paul/Levenson
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Connor Deserves Happiness, Connor Lives AU, Ghost Evan, M/M, evan dies, fluff if you squint, healing relationships (implied), or kinda, redo AU
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-01
Updated: 2019-11-01
Packaged: 2021-01-16 13:17:18
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,521
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21271658
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CravingCraze/pseuds/CravingCraze
Summary: Evan Hansen is dead. He's almost certain of it.Well, certain because things changed after he died. And if for the better or good, well, he wasn't exactly sure.It was like the universe wiped away all his mistakes. Him lying to the Murphy's, The Connor Project, all of it.Especially Connor dying. Somehow, he lived, and Evan died.





	Someone Will Come Running

**Author's Note:**

> Trigger warning for suicide and suicide attempt
> 
> This was meant for halloween but I ran out of time. Oh well, late halloween special for ya’ll. I don’t give a shit if the spooky season is over.

Evan Hansen is dead. He's almost certain of it.

Well, certain because things _changed _after he died. And if for the better or good, well, he wasn't exactly sure.

It was like the universe wiped away all his mistakes. Him lying to the Murphy's, The Connor Project, _all of it._

Especially Connor dying. Somehow, he lived, and Evan died.

Evan woke up in Ellison State Park, confused, scared, and lost. He still remembered everything he did to Connor and his family, and was convinced that this was the universe exacting revenge on him.

He could leave Ellison, but he couldn't talk to anyone or get any help. He could only watch the world pass by.

Connor looked like he was getting help at last. He looked similar to the first day of school, but he smiled more than he saw him during his high school career. Even things between him and Zoe were starting to mend.

But Connor would sometimes look _directly _at him, like he was real, and not trapped in another reality.

It gave him hope. Evan wouldn't lie about that. Those brief moments made him feel less invisible, like he mattered just for a second, even if he'd never talk to Connor.

"Why the fuck are you hanging around me?" Connor had asked at last, one day, and it made everything Evan thought was real crumble into dust.

The times Connor looked at him weren't coincidences, they were intentional, because Evan had been following him around like a fucking creeper for about a week.

"You can- you can see me?"

"What are you...?" Connor tried to touch him, but his hand just waved through his arm. He shivered, retracting his hand. "You're cold."

"I'm dead," Evan didn't mean for it to sound so monotone, but it was something he'd just accepted at this point. "I'm... a ghost."

It was bewildering at first, for the both of them. Evan wasn't used to talking to others, and sometimes Connor couldn't, because he was around other people, so they'd probably think he's insane.

"You know, I haven't heard that you died," Connor stated matter-of-factly, as he redid his nail polish. They'd known each other for roughly two weeks,

"Then how am I a ghost?" Evan persisted, watching him, bored out of his mind. He hadn't gotten the hang of possession just yet so he couldn't do anything fun.

Connor just shrugged, finishing a coat. "I dunno. It was just a thought."

Suddenly Evan couldn't get that thought out of his mind. Why didn't anyone talk about his death? It would've been a minor mention at most, since he literally _dropped _from a fifty foot tree. News stations probably did every person who passed away in their town, so Evan wouldn't be an exception.

Would he?

"Let's go to a graveyard," he suddenly stands up with the need to _know, _because what if he isn't dead? What will that even mean? Distinctly, he has an idea, and he doesn't like it.

"Evan, it's like, ten at night," Connor gave him a confused look.

Evan groaned loudly, digging his hands into his hair. "Fine! I'm going by myself!"

"Evan! No!" For a moment, Connor sounded worried for him, and he didn't know why. He bit his lip before saying, "Don't go on your own. Just... give me a minute to change."

That was how the two ended up in a graveyard at eleven at night, looking at the various tombstones with Connor's phone's light.

"Halson, Harvey... I'm sorry, Evan. I don't see your name anywhere," Connor let out a sigh, "Maybe you're just... an imaginary friend? No, that doesn't make any sense. Maybe your body was never found..."

This was all the proof Evan needed but didn't want. It was literally right in front of his face. And he'd probably sound insane, but it was the only way things made sense.

"I died in another- another timeline," he said with as much certainly his tone would allow, as it wavered.

Connor stared at him with disbelief, before laughing awkwardly. "Sure Evan! Like you're from another time!"

"But you- you were d-dead!" He insisted, not knowing what to say.

Connor paled, his face going blank. "That's not funny."

"No bi, I'm not trying to be-"

"That's not _fucking _funny!" He roared, stepping towards him. Evan automatically stepped back, despite being transparent.

"Connor please, I'm not- I'm not making this up! You died, and I tried to help by er, l-lying, but it went too far! They thought we were f-friends, I _let _them think that, your family treated me like I was replacing you, which is totally weird right? And then Zoe kissed me-"

"Hold on," Connor stopped him. "Zoe and you were a _thing?"_

"She- she was too good for me..." Evan shook his head. "Look, it's fucked up, I know! I've been _dealing _with this for months and-" he cut himself off, tears suddenly rolling down his cheeks.

Connor could only stare in shock. It was like his mind had completely stopped working.

"You're alive, that's all that matters," he said softly, refusing to look at him.

Connor messed with his jacket, debating whether or not to say what he was thinking about. He eventually decided, and said, "I've had dreams where I'm dead."

It was Evan's time to be shocked. "Like- watching yourself die-?"

"No," Connor shook his head. "Just, me being a ghost. Just like you. I had them all over the summer, but they've stopped when you came."

Evan furrowed his brow, "Are you saying that..."

"You're dreaming? I mean, this is way to complex to dream about, it probably would've been long over by now, and usually you wake up when you realize you're dreaming," he shook his head.

Evan fidgeted with his polo. "Did you dream about- you know..."

"About my family being happier without me? Yes. About you lying? Nope," he clicked his tongue.

"Are you... mad?" Realistically, it was okay for him to be mad. It was perfectly reasonable. Evan would be upset if he were in his shoes.

Connor let out a breath. "I am, but I'm not gonna yell at you or anything. Won't do any good."

"Oh um," he supposed that this was the best possible outcome. "Thank you? I... don't know what to say."

"You don't have to say anything. Just... stay with me, okay?" It was weird he was saying this, but with what happened with Miguel, it sort of made sense.

So, Evan stayed by Connor's side, acting like a secret friend who tried to help out when he had bad breakdowns. It was weird and complicated, but there wasn't much he could do. He grew curious about his mom, if she knew what happened to him- or him from this timeline, at least. He was scared to go see her, though. He didn't want to see how much she was hurting because of all this. He wouldn't be able to bear it.

"I want to see my mom," Evan had told him, "But I don't think I could h-handle the heartbroken look on her face. I've- she's hurting, so much, probably cause of me..."

Connor could tell it wasn't easy for Evan, so he decided to distract him. "I wanna take you out for a bit. Could use the fresh air."

Evan can't really argue, because it's been a few days since they went to the graveyard, and he practically stays inside Connor's room, watching what the other's doing while working on levitation. Other times Connor has school so he just... stays behind. He's determined that he's a bit ghost, so he has to be able to touch stuff.

Connor wound up taking them to The Orchard. Sunny Smiles Apple Orchard, to be exact. The apples on the trees are rotten but the trees still look beautiful, despite the obvious lack of care they've had.

"I used to come here with my family back when things were okay. Back before I had fucking depression or anxiety," Connor shook his head, sighing.

Evan could understand how that felt. Mental health really did come and fuck everything up. Silently, he put a hand on Connor's back, unaware that he was actually _touching _him.

Connor shivered and looked at Evan, at his hand, and back at Evan.

"Holy shit."

It was a revaluation. A big one. Neither knew what it meant, but they both knew it was important.

And of _course _near the end of the day there, Connor stands on the top of the hill as the sun sets, reflecting perfectly onto his face, hair, jacket, his _everything. _

It's horribly cliche that Evan realized he was crushing on Connor. Big time.

He decided it was best to suppress these feelings, and ultimately chose to see his mother, no matter how much he dreaded it.

Heidi obviously didn't see him, but she seemed exhausted as usual, and more sad. Just peaking over her shoulder revealed hospital bills, and he wondered what they were for.

She headed out to work shortly after, and Evan decided to follow her. Heidi clocked in, and went inside room 212.

Something about that made Evan feel uneasy, but he floated through the door anyways, needing to know.

On the other side, he saw his mom holding _his _hand, or well, his body's hand. He remained almost as motionless as his body, that only moved its chest, up and down to _breathe._

He looked at the heart monitor, and sure enough, it was steadily beeping.

Evan Hansen was _alive. _It was just a full on fact at this point.

His body looked pale, and had bags under its eyes. His body was attached to all different types of wires he didn't know what did. Some looked like they gave it water or nutrients. The other's he wasn't sure on.

Suddenly he couldn't stay there anymore. He ran out, and back to Connor's house. He hid inside his room, trying not to break down. He didn't know whether to be happy or upset because he survived somehow, the same attempt he made was hurting his mom in _so many ways _his wishes he could just take away.

Connor noticed immediately when he came in. "Hey, what's wrong?"

That was literally all it took for the dam to break.

Evan started sobbing about his mom, how miserable she was, how much Life Support was costing, and that he was alive and didn't know how to feel. He talked about how all his life he just wanted to end his, but now he doesn't think he does. He wants to _live, _even if not permanently.

It hits him like a rockslide.

For the first time in the longest time ever, he wants to live. And it's incredibly scary.

"What'd you think will happen when you- or maybe your body, wakes up," Connor asked after Evan calmed down.

Evan shrugged, "I don't know. I'm scared I won't remember you or anything that's happened, though."

"If you do forget, I'll still be by you," Connor assured with a smile. It fell though, when he tried to rub his arm. "I wish I could touch you."

"I'm not sure why you'd want to," he smiled weakly.

"Because I _like _you, Evan. I really like talking to you, listening to you, and doing stupid shit because of a hunch you have. It's... beyond fucked, I know, but I can't help it," Connor smiled back at him, and that smile held so many unspoken words. A want to hold him, to have their knees bump, to hold his hand, everything.

Evan would've blushed if he could've, but he unconsciously crinkled his nose pressed his lips together, brow furrowed ever so slightly, and smiled more.

"Is that your blushing face?" Connor teased him, grinning like an idiot.

"Um- no," he tried to hide his face from Connor.

"So I'm guessing just from _that, _the feelings mutual?" Connor laughed lightly, watching all of Evan's features tighten a little. He assumed it was another thing he did when he blushed.

"Am I that obvious?" He asked sheepishly.

"Not really," he shook his head. "You're really hard on yourself, though. I've already forgiven you for that time at the graveyard, but you haven't."

"Can't help I feel so guilty," Evan just shrugged. "I mean... I did all of that."

"I don't think you should be. Just... learn from it and move on," he offered. "We all make mistakes- shitty or not- and that's what makes us human. You could've tried to hide what you did, but you came upfront and told me. I guess that's why I'm not as mad."

"Okay," He let out a breath. "Thanks, Connor." He could feel his eyelids getting heavy, which was weird because he'd never gotten tired before.

"Yeah. Of course. Um, what hospital did you go to?" Evan wasn't sure why Connor wanted to know, but he told him the name and his room number.

"It's just in case.... I wanna visit you- your body. I don't fucking know, Ev. This is all crazy," Connor groaned, not knowing how to explain himself.

"It's okay," Evan yawned, and was still weirded out by the tiredness. " 'm sleepy..." he muttered, leaning against the bed. 

"That's a first," Connor teased him, but didn't press further, as he pulled out a book to read as Evan slowly fell asleep for the first time in ages.

And then he woke up. 

He could feel _everything. _His heart beating out of his chest, his eyelashes, his teeth, the hospital gown he was in, and _so much more. _

Evan frantically looked around, wanting to tell anyone that he finally woke up, but the room was empty. He spotted the call button, and decided to try and grab it.

He nearly fell out of bed trying. 

Everything felt heavy to him, but that was probably due to being a half dead ghost boy for almost a month. He felt himself shaking harshly, and decided to lay back and try to get some more rest, still feeling tired.

The next time he woke up was when his mother came in. She was crying tears of joy, noticing that Evan was sleeping on his side and not on his back, like the nurse's set him out. Evan hugged her tightly, the realization of missing her came crashing down, and he cried too, partly because of what he put her through, whispering constantly, '_I'm sorry', _but Heidi told him not to say that because he was suffering, but would get more help. He still cried, but it was happy tears of finally being with his mom again.

Connor came a few hours later, grinning so wide it looked like it hurt. It didn't matter to him, because he could at last hold Connor's hand without it being just a flurry of cold prickling his skin, or it just passing through his hand. Connor even pecked his lips, which was it was short, was not disappointing.

"Welcome back, Ev."

If this was a chance to start over, he was _not _going to waste it.

**Author's Note:**

> If ya’ll want to talk to me, my main shitposting account (what I use most) is @cravingcraze https://www.tumblr.com/blog/cravingcraze  
My writing blog is @cravingcrazewriting https://www.tumblr.com/blog/cravingcrazewriting  
I’m probably gonna work on some Galaxy Gals next.


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